Flavor of the fuckin month. Do not be so foolish as to assume this is for or about you. Its for me. I do not comprehend love, and will be the first to admit that. I do not comprehend the 'spark' or the 'feeling.' I do not understand those who think love or even strong feelings occur quickly or painlessly.
Love, as I've lived it, breathed it, felt it, and enjoyed it, is a long arduous process, not immediate or quick, or even necessarily painless and enjoyable. Love is dirty. Love is messy. Love takes time. I find myself writing yet another of these, knowing that this possibility has been snuffed short yet again, life squeezed from it. Why are people so scared of getting hurt so fickle and quick to harm others?
I have one time in my life, intentionally left another human being, for nothing short of extreme glaring issues with this person and her personality. I have, and always will give anyone else the benefit of the doubt, and every possible opportunity to show me what could be. You can't learn that person well enough over course of a month to know if they're for you or not. It doesn't happen. You cannot remain closed off to another individual and be surprised that you do not feel strongly for them.
How can you possibly love someone who doesnt know you? How can someone who doesn't know you possibly love you? It will not happen, and it will never work. You sometimes must give someone the benefit of the doubt and take it on blind faith that something beautiful can result. Had I backed away from two people I had zero in common with, I would have missed on countless incredible experiences, and been cheated of many beautiful moments, memories and experiences. Give someone the benefit of the doubt. Love takes time, they might surprise you.
Memory
11 years ago
1 comment:
There are many different types of love...and very few are based on time. Most don't understand time. Most are not ruled by time. Most of their existences are based solely on feeling. It is humans that give love the quality of time. It is that same base of feeling that we sometimes allow to rule our life. It may not make sense. It may not follow the perfect structure of time, or even the chaotic indifference of love, but we can allow feeling to govern our choices. (and how uncomfortable is it to live against how one feels?) Right and wrong is an opinion. Sometimes things just don't work out and it doesn't make senses. Sometimes feelings happen and we don't know why. Sometimes there is too much time, but mostly there is to little.
Keep your chin up, Jack. You know you're a strong person, I know you're a strong person and good will come. There are no mistakes.
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